I need this Dog I didn’t fart my butt blew you a kiss shirt. Better to set your expectation correctly. If the grandma doesn’t want to help, rather than constantly being disappointed, either hire a sitter or partner with another new mom and help each other out. One watches both kids 4 hours while another does chores/nap etc. And then switch. It is a lot harder for mental health to be constantly disappointed, than just correcting one’s own expectations based on reality. As in, ok this person cannot help me, what other outlets for help can I find for myself.
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Moreover, even if the grandma is willing to help but constantly negative Dog I didn’t fart my butt blew you a kiss shirt. Is that help worth it at the cost of being on the receiving end of toxic comments? So yes, I think a large majority cannot rely on family help for one reason or another. It’s a reality. Where you go from there, to find that help yourself and being in a place that works for you: that’s the best for mental health. Tell her how that makes you feel but refrain from asking her for help anymore seems like she won’t let that go. Most grandmas love getting their grandbabies. If you have others in your life willing to help ask them. Discuss how it makes you feel and leave it as such.